oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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