on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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