You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
