It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
