It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
