Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Randomize
