Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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