I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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