Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Randomize