I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
