He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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