I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
We got so high we made milksteak
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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