Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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