Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(479): View more from Arkansas

I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?

(1-479): View more from Arkansas

I believe so, yes.

(479): View more from Arkansas

Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?

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(720): View more from Colorado

By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."

(815): View more from Illinois

oh god.

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(818): View more from California

he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror

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(850): View more from Florida

Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.

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