Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Randomize
