You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
