Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
