did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
