Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
