3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Randomize
