I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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