If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
