tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
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