I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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