its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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