So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Randomize
