Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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