if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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