How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
