What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize