i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Randomize
