My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Randomize
