piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Randomize
