So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
