Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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