No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
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