I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
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