God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
