we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
