I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
