garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
