if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
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