Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
