I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Randomize
