do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
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