ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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