Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
i think i just lost a toe
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