At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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