I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
this must be what syphilis tastes like
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
