Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
